Monday, July 25, 2005

How Teachers Have Fun (embarrassing, but true)

Too funny. (In a dorky teacher-sort of way)

"Get Out Your Blenders and Drink Up!"
--From Eduwonk
As promised, here is a list of 24 jargony words to drink by... The rules are simple: Each time you hear one of these often-used words from the education world, take a swig of whatever makes you happy. If you have no beverage (as often happens when these words come up) feel free to giggle, as long as you promise to do it in a manner that is completely condescending to those around you!
Get your glasses ready...

1. Rubric (Just try not to laugh the next time you hear it!)
2. Paradigm
3. Time-on-task
4. Incentivize
5. Dead white guys
6. Scaffold (as a verb)
7. Authentic learning
8. Differentiated instruction
9. Integrated learning
10. Constructivist
11. Balanced literacy
12. Highly qualified
13. Standards-based
14. Performance-based
15. Research-based
16. Scientifically-based
17. Self-directed learning (Sounds too much like something that causes hair to grow on palms.)
18. Developmentally-appropriate
19. Capacity building
20. Best practices (Mandatory group hugs, however, around anyone who uses the vernacular "stuff that works pretty good.")
21. Higher order thinking (I had a roommate in college who was really into higher order thinking. He is no longer able to produce children.)
22. Collaborate (Not unless pastries are served.)
23. Transparency (It doesn't really exist.)
24. Train wreck (When used to describe standards movement/NCLB, etc. )

-- Joe Williams

An English teacher at Max Hayes devised a similar buzz-word/jargon game to be played at monthly faculty meetings, filling up bingo cards as opposed to filling up on beverages. Administrators were at first surprised to hear the shout of "BINGO!" in the midst of a discussion about "proficiency-driven curriculum".
Eventually the players only rated an eye roll, and the educationese drone would continue.

PS. I contributed three words to the original list posted at Eduwonk.
Can you guess which ones?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm looking into a 12-step as we speak cuz I predict I'll be doing a lot of drinking this year.

As for your contribution to the mentioned list, I'll go with train wreck, best practices, and higher-order thinking.

marybeth said...

Close, but no cigar.
Good guesses,though.
Here are my contributions:

2. Pradigms
13. Standards-based
14. Performance-based